I'm 23 years old, about to graduate university, hate my weekend job but work it to pay rent, spend too much money changing my appearance (as in tattoos, not surgery - yet) and I always get asked what I want to do when I'm older:
From a young age we're asked what we want to do when we're 'big'. When you're 5 it's usually something related to a cartoon. For example my little one wants to be a ninja turtle when he's older. As we get older it's usually something a bit more believable like a doctor or a teacher, but I noticed that when I was in high school I no longer knew what I wanted to do.
How was I meant to choose my option modules for my GCSE's without knowing what I wanted to do? And my college degree, and now my university degree.
Because I didn't know what I wanted to do, and I still don't fully know, I chose generic degrees in college and university. Degrees that I can take with me to a generic office job.
But now I have tattoos and piercing - tattoos which I have to hide in work as we're not meant to have them on display. This greatly minimises the areas of work which I can go into as many places don't allow tattoos.
I think it's stupid that I should know what I want to do. And I think it's stupid that I should have to cover up my tattoos. Yes tattoos may offend some people, but so does rude behaviour and no one has to hide that in work...
I've wanted to be a lot of things in my lifetime. I've had doctor, teacher, nurse, artist, journalist, architecture, good old fashioned 9-5 office worker, and even a housewife on my list of things I wanted to be. Truth is though that life gets in the way and you can't just map out your future like that.
I hate the job I'm in, and I hate working weekends, but it's the only job apart from night work that i can do as I have to work around William being in school.
And that's just how life is. I've been looking for other work for when I graduate but I haven't found anything.
I just want to be my own boss for now but I don't even want to continue with my shop as I'm a little bored of it.
That's the problem with me, I get bored of things easily. I know that I shouldn't and that i should just stick to something but I'm 23 years old. I have my whole life ahead of me. If I can't discover who I am in my 20s then it might be too late come my 30s (although my mums in her late 40s and she's still figuring out who she wants to be).
So fuck it. Do what you want and don't regret it. You don't have to have your life together just yet, and you don't have to have your life together by tomorrow. Just live each day as it comes and see where the future takes you.
P.S I'm not saying to give up on your dreams. If you want to be an astronaut then go ahead and pursue it. I mean it more for those who don't know where they're going.